I’ve recently started watching Dexter. Don’t judge me, I am too Jennifer Aniston, Disney & Taylor Swift to watch a show based upon a serial killer. The concept only make me queasy. Hmmm, but my brother didn’t leave much of choice to me this time.
Anyway, here’s a secret, I love the show. Now, that we are on to secrets, here’s one more: I realized that I am like Dexter. No I haven’t killed anyone…yet. I have had the urge sometimes with my ex boss, my stalker, I have a list. But I haven’t killed, neither would I ever want to. I am like Dexter, because…wait for it….*drumrolls*….even I have a Dark Passenger.
You know till now I’ve been professing my love for Gulzar Saab & Pablo Neruda. I keep telling people how much I heart Irshaad Kaamil, Shiv Kumar Batlavi, Amrita Pritam, E E Cummings & Elliot. I do love them so truly, passionately & deeply. And then, comes a time on a cold morning, inside the closed doors of the bathroom, under the shower, I break into “Thande Thande Paani Se Nahana Chahiye” & that’s when the ‘Dark Passenger’ takes over & I move on to “Tip Tip Barsa Paani” & the series continues till I run out of the hot water.
So there it is, that’s my Dark Passenger. My secret devotion to the embarrassing songs of 80s & 90s. The typical rickshawwalla, death of poetry, funny dress & dance songs & I secretly enjoy them. That’s my guilty pleasure.
Just like, Dexter had Hannah Mckay & Miguel Prado to share his Dark Passenger with, even I am not alone. I realized this when I was Skyping with a friend who said that he secretly hearts “Tamma Tamma Loge” . Another friend once confided that Bollywood has let him down big time. “All these years of roaming on the roads of Mumbai on monsoon nights & never once I saw Raveena Tondon or any girl for that matter dancing in a yellow saree.”
It was so relieving that I am not alone in this. I guess, this is a curse of being a 90s child.
MY TOP 10 GUILTY PLEASURE SONGS: THE CURSE OF BEING A 90S CHILD
10. Main teri Dushman, Dushman tu mera, main Naagin tu Sapera..aa..aa
No Antakshri has ever started without “M se…M se…Main Teri Dushman” & no Road trip, wedding, family get together, picnic or a free period in school has ever finished without Antakshri. So this song is not just, Sri Devi dancing like a snake song, but this song is my childhood.
9 Sarkai Lo Khatiya
To the six years old me, this song seemed so innocent, two people jumping on the bed, playing with the pillows, that’s so fun!!!! So much fun, that each time a guest would say, “Beta, I’ve heard you go to Kathak classes. Show something na..” And I’ll climb on the sofa & break into Sarkai Liyo Khatiya. At that time, I could never comprehend the horror on my parents’ faces. Now I can, with all due respect, the song’s so Bhojpuri.
I am so embarrassed for liking & dancing on this song when I was a kid. More embarrassed than Karisma Kapoor can ever be of doing this number with those eyebrows & hair. Still, each time on a winter night when I crawl inside a cosy blanket I sing this song. Thankfully, I sing it in my head.
8. Tu Cheez Badi Hai Mast Mast
Once, I was playing this song & someone walked in. Before I could minimize the screen the person said, “Oooh I like this song”. “Should play it from the top”, I offered. “Nahin yaad hai” were his words as he settled next to me.
I can totally understand the ‘yaad hai’ part. It has been so many years & still if you ask me to dance on the song I can sing & dance matching word by word & step by step to it. I even remember that Paresh Rawal part. Not that I am proud of it.
Back then, this song was my favorite. Week after week I would bitch about ‘Philips Top 10’ for putting this song on No.3 & “Ek Ladki ko Dekha Toh Aisa laga” at No.2. I wondered why the people behind this show couldn’t see the beauty of this song. Now, I just wonder how could Raveena Tondon date Akshay Kumar. I mean Akshay is hot & all now, but back then with that Bandana & shades & that carpet of chest hair that could threaten even Anil Kapoor!
7. Sexy Sexy Sexy Mujhe Log Bole
This song came out as “Sexy, Sexy, Sexy” & then typical blah blah blah & voila it was “Baby baby baby”. That’s when I realized that ‘sexy’ is a ‘haw’ word. Curious, I picked up the dictionary, you know, the lure of a ‘haw’ word & fascination to know its meaning. My pocket Oxford dictionary had no word called ‘sexy’ in it. But, I found ‘sex’ there. So, dear censor see this is what happens when you try to be over smart. Knowing the meaning of sexy would’ve done less damage to my ‘innocence’.
6. Oonchi Hai Building
What was Anu Malik thinking? As if music direction wasn’t a big enough proof of his creative genius, he decided to write the lyrics & sing them too!!! I am sure he must have gone to every singer around but come on how can anyone do justice to it. Although Wikipedia suggests otherwise, I am convinced that Anu Malik was also the choreographer here.
5. Meri Marzi..eh
A Gujju Bhai doing rap, a lipstick wearing old uncle with a Werewolf Complex & Govinda dressed as Gladiator…if this is not an artistic masterpiece then what is?
So don’t judge me, when I say that I love the song. “Main apni shaadi mein na jaaon” that’s super rebel. Also, “Main doodh ke sang whiskey pee jaaon”, been there done that, please don’t ask what happened next.
4. Diiiiil Macarena
I was crazy about Macarena, but whatever those uncles in black jacket sang…was so difficult to understand. You know that annoying moment- when a song plays in your head but you can’t sing it because you you don’t know the lyrics, Macarena was that song for me. Anu Malik solved this problem. So yayie!
3. Tan Tana Tan Tan Tara
Even in the years when this song was popular, I loved it secretly in a hush hush way. Reason: This was such an eve teasers’ delight. You know those guys who can never summon the courage to even say hello to you, they would go after my friends & me singing this song. So, publicly, I was offended & outraged with this song but I love this song then & I love it now.
2. Oye Oye
Again a confession: I was introduced to this song by ‘Betex’ advertisement. In fact, my brother still sings it as “Trichi topi wale…Betex laga le” I guess, that’s his idea of remix.
And the #1 song on the list is
1. Choli Ke Peeche Kya Hai
This was such a ‘haw’ song in my home. The channels would be changed when it was played. We weren’t allowed to sing it or buy the cassette of this movie. Still pyaar toh hona hi tha & aur pyaar kiya toh darna kya.
It was my favorite song then, it’s my love even now. Madhuri never looked or danced better. I break into ghati dance each time I hear this song. No matter where I am, I have done this in office too. I can sleep dance to it. I think this song deserves a separate blog.
And the song, which deserves an honorary mention in this post is:
Tip Tip Barsa Paani
Here’s the secret of all secrets, I don’t know what’s the big deal about this song. But, all the boys whom I know from 20-30 drool over this. For them, it’s ‘man maker’ song & I can never even see what they find so hot in it? I guess, what’s ‘Choli ke peeche” is to me this song is to the boys I know. No ‘daaru/ghati dance” party is complete without this song for them. For the heck of social conformity I nod along, but seriously what’s so special about it? Can someone please tell me?